September 10, 2003
Yesterday, in fact, the day before and yesterday, I was watching 'Merlin' on Hallmark Channel. My last boyfriend is nicknamed 'merlin'. Sadly, I never knew who and what merlin is all about, except that he's a wizard. And, 'tis merlin just admitted to me that he, too, doesn't know that much about his own nic. tsktsk. hehe
There was a statement that left an impression on me from the show and I thought I'd share here.
"When you are forgotten, you cease to exist."
How true is that? Well, true enough and powerful enough for Merlin to destroy his own wicked mother, who is the Queen of magic. He, simply, ignores and forgets about her. And she sorta vanished, disintegrated into thin air, ceased to exist.
But, I was just pondering on the statement. Is that true? I think, slowly, I'm coming to a conclusion that it is indeed true. When you have completely chosen to forget and have truly forgotten about someone, that someone will cease to exist in your life. As good as any other stranger, even if he, or she, brushes past you. On the other hand, a person may have left you for many years, no longer a physical form in your life, but as long as you have not forgotten that person, he (or she) still continues to exist, as if he (or she) never went away. That's why we always say we can 'feel' that our deceased loved ones are still with us, eh?
Anyway, back to the show. I gotta say tis, that Hallmark Channel airs really great shows! Some of the best films I've ever watched are from the channel. Like, "And then there was one." My, that was a great show.
So, those of you who has the channel, give it a shot. Every weekday, 9pm. ^_^
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 16:20
September 04, 2003
You see, on one hand, Wenn is giving me all the green lights; on the other hand, Eugene is showing me that there's the red light; and in between, there is always that annoying or comforting amber.
Maybe it doesn't matter. Because at the end of the day, it is not me who can decide. And so, the story awaits its continuation and meanwhile, the journey continues.
I've been helping out at a second hand rental bookstore for the past 3 days. Pay's meagre but sure beats my bumming around at home, getting on my Dad's nerves (as he gets on mine), increasing my myopia condition by staring 10 hours into PC (been there, done that), and the like.
But yet, I found out I don't work well under supervision. That's quite contrary to most people, i guess. Or is it not? Anyway, see the mistakes and the things I do when my lady boss is around and you'd probably think I'm like commonsense-less, one of 'em grads who know life from books but not life in reality. In fact, I do feel that way myself sometimes too. But hey, once my boss's back is turned, I do things nicely, my usual efficient way (I can't resist adding), and perhaps it's an entirely different way or working but sure gets the work done productively too. It's when I've to blend my way with her way of doing things that glitches happen. And the boo-boos are sometimes quite laughable.
Working at this bookstore is definitely not what I thought it was, and not the same as the one I've seen Anna experienced. Nope, no Hugh Grant, no Julia Roberts, no romance. Yes, stock-taking (ve I mentioned the store carries a real extensive range of magazines???), yes, wrapping and unwrapping magazines and books. Nothing romantic about this. Mundane? yes. That's why I've started to zap into screen saver mode when I do the magazines. And that's when I commit some stupid senseless mistakes.
Aside from this, I've been joining in the job hunt game again since yesterday. I kinda figured there must be better and more suitable jobs for me than waiting for the prison department to decide if they wanna shortlist me. So, juz keeping my fingers and toes crossed.
These days, fingers and toes don't seem to have a chance to uncross anymore. Thousand and one reasons to cross them, minute basis.
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 00:13
September 01, 2003
Did I say, about 1 month ago, that my crush period will 'soon pass'? Fortunately, I'm quite used to eating back my own words. They say 'keep your words soft and sweet cos you never know when you have to eat them.' Let's juz say my personal liking is crunchy.
But, some things you know are not meant to be means are not meant to be. There's nothing much to say or can be said about it.
Wenn begs to differ, as I expected. Impossibility and possibility is only a thin line difference, the lady insisted. But, sometimes, to make an impossibility into a possibility will churn out more unexpected (and most likely, undesired) consequences than you can handle.
But, it's equally sad seeing 'could have been's turn into 'can never be's. It's ok lah. I'd see how long I last before all hope runs dry. hehe
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 22:30